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Change Your Thoughts - Change Your Life © A.J. Mahari March 2010

Change Your Life - Change Your Thoughts Ebook by A.J. Mahari

Punishment and Revenge in BPD Ebook by A.J. Mahari © A.J. Mahari 2010

Punishment and Revenge in BPD Ebook by A.J. Mahari

Full Circle - Lessons For Non Borderlines Ebook by A.J. Mahari © A.J. Mahari 2007

Full Circle - Lessons For Non Borderlines Ebook by A.J. Mahari

The Power of Gratitude - Healing - Recovery - Wellness and Getting Unstuck © A.J. Mahari December 2010

The Power of Gratitude Ebook by A.J. Mahari

Quest For Self - Building Conscious Self Awareness - Ebook/Coaching Guide/Workbook and Audio © A.J. Mahari January 2011

Quest For Self - Building Conscious Self Awareness Ebook and Audio by A.J. Mahari


When a Family Member Has Borderline Personality Disorder © A.J. Mahari - February 2008

On the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder there are the family members and loved ones of those with BPD. In so many ways being on the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder is a very painful and confusing place to be.


A.J. Mahari has Ebooks, Audio Programs, Video, Life Coaching Services and Self Help Courses available for non borderlines.


A.J. Mahari is currently writing a memoir about her life and experience as a person who had two parents with Borderline Personality Disorder, as a person who was diagnosed herself with BPD at the age of 19 and from her perspective as someone who has recovered from BPD. There is a new section on her BPD Blog called The Diary - My Borderline Years


While there are many commonalities that those who have BPD share, there are also individual differences in how BPD manifests itself in the lives of those diagnosed with it. There isn't any across the board rule in terms of how people with BPD will be, how they will relate, how they will experience their relationships, or whether or not they will get on or stay on the road to recovey.

Perhaps one of the most challenging relationships for those who are on the other side of BPD is that of a family member in what are commonly referred to as "unchosen relationships" to denote these types of relationships from significant other intimate relationships.

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In the video below, entitled, "Living With Borderline Personality Disorder", Catherine Roach shares her experience of life with a sister with Borderline Personality Disorder..

Unchosen relationships with those who have Borderline Personality Disorder involve having a family member such as a parent, child, adult-child, sibling, or cousin and so forth who has BPD. There are many complicated issues for people in these situations on the other side of BPD as they struggle to cope with what are often worsening and profoundly painful emotional realities for the person with BPD in their lives.

As Catherine Roach illustrates in her video (to the left here) being the relative of a person with BPD is often an enigmatic quagmire to which there aren't always solutions. Roach's conclusion is that in the end all one can do is love and support the family member with BPD and "hope that it will get better". This is admirable and likely what many hope for, try to do, and struggle with. It is one choice available. However, when Roach concludes that love and support are on-going she doesn't really define what that looks like or how that is achieved or if it is acheived the cost - the emotional cost - at which that is achieved. In my up-coming book I examine these very issues, among many others.

The choices available to those who find themselves in these unchosen relationships on the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder when a relative is diagnosed with BPD are complicated and often gut-wrenching choices.





A.J.'s New BPD Blog

A.J. will be featuring many of her articles on her new Blog dedicated to Borderline Personality Disorder for both those with BPD and non borderlines in a much more organized way by category as opposed to year and date. She will also be adding new material from time to time. So please check out A.J.'s Borderline Personality Disorder Blog

The Adult-Child of a Borderline Mother By A.J. Mahari



audio logo "Facing the Facts of Borderline Personality Disorder - On The Other Side of BPD - For Loved Ones and Family Members of those With BPD" Audio Program by A.J. Mahari.


As only one who has been there can A.J. Mahari identifies and explains, from the inside out of Borderline Personality Disorder 10 Main Key Central Facts of Borderline Personality Disorder that Loved Ones and Family Members need to understand to free themselves from the painful hooks and emotional traps on the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder.

read more ...



When a Family Member Has Borderline Personality Disorder Continued


In many cases family members are too weighed down in the obligation that is often felt to be there and to support a loved one regardless of the toll that being on the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder exacts from their lives. Many people who either ascribe to this philosophy and/or meaning of family often end up on what amounts to a endless rollercoaster ride of borderline chaos that is not only very painful but that profoundly affects the quality of their own lives more often than not in negative and troubling ways.

What's a person to do? What are you to do if you are the a family member of someone with Borderline Personality Disorder - a mother of an adult-child with BPD, or the sibling of a person with BPD, or the adult-child of a parent with BPD? What are you to do?

In my own experience as the adult-child of two parents with Borderline Personality Disorder, I made what, perhaps many would think to be, a very difficult choice. It may well be the choice of the the road less travelled for sure. I really don't know. Each person has to, of course, come to his or her own choices when a family member (or more than one family member) has BPD.





A.J. Mahari has Ebooks, Audio Programs, Video, Life Coaching Services and Self Help Courses available for non borderlines.

No reproduction in whole or in part without written consent of A.J. Mahari. To seek permission to re-produce anything on this site or to link anything on this site please email me at othersideofbpd@yahoo.ca - I do not give my consent for anything I've written or made available here in my original videos or audio clips to be re-produced on any other website without my expressed permission. If you wish to link to an article I've written please link directly to the article page on this site - thanks so much!

More Information about Borderline Personality Disorder




In this video, Personality Disorder in general and more specifically Borderline Personality Disorder is defined. The symptoms and treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder are discussed.











This video, originally published at http://www.treatementonline.com/treat..., is part one of a two part series in which a therapist discusses what he has learned about treating the borderline client. Those who are diagnosed with borderline personality disorder are often misunderstood and discriminated against, sometimes even by those in the mental health community. (less) Added: March 16, 2007





In this second part of our discussion with Ivan Spielberg, LCSW, which was originally published at http://www.treatmentonline.com/treatm..., Mr. Spielberg talks about strategies and tools that have been successful in helping his borderline clients move toward a healthier life.










audio logo "Facing the Facts of Borderline Personality Disorder - On The Other Side of BPD - For Loved Ones and Family Members of those With BPD" Audio Program by A.J. Mahari.


As only one who has been there can A.J. Mahari identifies and explains, from the inside out of Borderline Personality Disorder 10 Main Key Central Facts of Borderline Personality Disorder that Loved Ones and Family Members need to understand to free themselves from the painful hooks and emotional traps on the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder.

read more ...








Last up-dated February 27, 2010





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The Legacy of Abandonment in Borderline Personality Disorder © A.J. Mahari 2006

The Legacy of Abandonment in Borderline Personality Disorder

The Abandoned Pain of Borderline Personality Disorder © A.J. Mahari 2006

The Abandoned Pain of Borderline Personality Disorder

Mindfulness and Radical Acceptance for Non Borderlines © A.J. Mahari 2006

The Lost Self in BPD



Break Free From the BPD Maze - Recovery For Non Borderlines Audio Program © A.J. Mahari 2006

The Lost Self in BPD

5 Bundle Set Ebooks - Core Wound In BPD © A.J. Mahari 2006

5 Bundle Set Ebooks - Core Wound In BPD

Adult Child of BPD Mother in Search For Closure Audio © A.J. Mahari 2006



A.J. Mahariís Thought Changing Affirmations 5 Volume Set © A.J. Mahari 2006

The Lost Self in BPD