BASIC PRINCIPLES OF ACCEPTING REALITY
Accepting reality does not mean you have to like the circumstances. Tools to
help you accept reality: Breathing, half smile, awareness)
i.e. Radical Acceptance: I have suicidal thoughts all the time but it
doesn't mean I like having them or will act on them.
WILLINGNESS - CHANGE OF ATTITUDE FROM WILLFULNESS - BEING STUBBORN , RIGID,
Cultivate a WILLING response to each situation
Willingness is doing just what is needed in each situation, in an
unpretentious way. It is focusing on effectiveness.
Willingness is listening very carefully to your WISE MIND, acting from your
Willingness is Allowing in to awareness your connection to the universe - to
the earth, to the floor you are standing on, to the chair, you are sitting
on, to the person you are talking to.
In 5 years from now, will the situration that causes the distress matter?
WILLFULNESS IS WHEN YOUR ARE SITTING ON YOUR HANDS, WHEN ACTION IS NEEDED,
REFUSING TO MAKE CHANGES THAT ARE NEEDED, WILLFULLNES, CAUSES YOU TO FIGHT
ANY SUGGESTIONS THAT WILL IMPROVE THE DISTRESS MAKING IT MORE TOLERABLE
WILLFULLNESS IS GIVING UP. IT IS THE OPPOSITE OF DOING WHAT WORKS, OF BEING
EFFECTIVE WILLFULLNESS IS TRYING TO FIX EVERY SITUATION, IT IS REFUSING TO
TOLERATE THE DISTRESSFUL MOMENT.
TURNING THE MIND
Acceptance of realtiy as it is requires an act of CHOICE. It is like coming
to a fork in the road. You have to turn your mind towards the acceptance
road and away form the rejecting realtiy road.
You have to make and inner COMMITTMENT to accept. The COMMITTMENT to accept
does not itself equal acceptance . It just turns you toward the path. But it
si the first step.
You have to turn your mind and commit to acceptance OVER AND OVER AND OVER
Again. Sometimes, you have to make the committment many times in the space
of a few minuites.
Basic Principles of Accepting Reality
2. TURNING THE MIND
Acceptance of reality as it is requires an act of CHOICE.. It is like coming
to a fork in the road.
You have to turn your mind towards the acceptance road and away from the
"rejecting reality" road.
You have to make an inner COMMITTMENT to accept. The COMMITTMENT to accept
does not itself equal acceptance. It just turns you toward the path. But it
is the first step.
You have to turn your mind and committ to acceptance OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AGAIN Sometimes you have to make the committment many tmes in the space of a
For example: I think I am stupid, I must turn my mind and tell myself, that I made
an error but I am not stupid.
Freedom from suffering requires ACCEPTANCE FROM DEEP WITHIN OF WHAT IT IS.
Letting yourself go completely with what it is. Let go of fighting reality.
ACCEPTANCE IS THE ONLY WAY OUT OF HELL WHICH MUST NOT BE INTERPRETED AS
APPROVAL OF THE DISTRESSFUL SITUATION
Pain creates suffering only when you refuse to ACCEPT the pain.
Deciding to tolerate the moment is ACCEPTANCE.
ACCEPTANCE is acknowledging what it is.
To accept somethng is not the same as judging it to be good.
By stopping your self from fighting, the rage or anger your feel within your
self will dissapate as long as you continue to accept your condition as a
BDP and your faulty perceptions to events or interpersonal communications
difficulties. You will be amazed at how much better you will feel when you
are able to "accept".